Picking the insects off plants.
No time to think of consequences.
MGMT “Kids” Video:
You were a child
Crawling on your knees toward it
Making momma so proud
But your voice was too loud
We like to watch you laughing
Picking insects off of plants
No time to think of consequences
Control yourself
Take only what you need from it
A family of trees wanted to be [...]
A chicken farmer went to a local bar…. Sat next to a woman and ordered a glass of champagne..
The woman perks up and says, ‘How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!’
‘What a coincidence’ the farmer says. ‘This is a special day for me…. I am celebrating’
‘This is a special day for [...]
All user accounts are deleted if inactive for more than ninety days.
All posts created with that user account will also be deleted.
Don’t smoke weed if shit like this happens to you.
You better be smart, if you want to catch the cake boy. Somehow, that leaves me with a sinking feeling that you stoopid bitches will fail miserably. Since you’re doing such a shitty job tracking him down, I’ve created a game to offer some clues. With these clues, a clever man will be able to [...]
Check out Cliff Pickover’s RealityCarnival. It’s a really fun place to waste a few hours and read some interesting stuff all in one place. Can you dig it?
You know you laughed!
This was obviously made for righties. I know a lefty that really needs one of these.
THANKS A LOT YA BOARD KILLER!!!
THANKS A LOT YA BOARD KILLER!!!
Insiders Debunk UFO Reports at Area 51
Source: AOL
Posted: 04/16/09 5:30PM
Filed Under: Science & Tech
(April 15) — Area 51, the top-secret military installation in the Nevada desert, has been a magnet for conspiracy theories and a font of UFO sightings for decades. Now some people who worked at the mysterious base are speaking out.
Photo Gallery
Getty
Strange Sights [...]
Have you been waiting for some “normalicy” to return to this site? Then this ‘best of’ is for you!
best of craigslist > washington, DC > You worthless bag of filth
Originally Posted: Thu, 26 Feb 07:37 EST
You worthless bag of filth
Date: 2009-02-26, 7:37AM EST
You vulgar little maggot.
You are a [...]
On the day before Ted Bundy’s execution, he gave an apparently candid interview with Dr. James Dobson. Yes. James Dobson expresses a faith in God, and I realize this post may be read by staunch religion haters. You may find the interviewer’s life perspective repellent.
Even so, the interview fascinated me. Ted Bundy acknowledges pornography and a [...]
Embedded video from CNN Video
While camping one summer in 1988, I had a vivid dream. A strange light enveloped my tent. The light slowly changed color sort of like a lava lamp, only I was looking outside instead of in. The lights quickly took control of my aggression and subdued any emotions save one–immobilizing fear.
The only bodily control that remain [...]
“How to keep the quality of CL R&R low” was posted on Los Angeles R&R this afternoon and I felt compelled to repost here as an example of the sarcasm that makes R&R’s “1 in 20″ a treat when discovered. Please join me in a ‘best of’ nod:
How to keep the quality of CL R&R [...]
Are your co-workers space aliens?
(This article has been attributed to a number of different sources, mostly tabloid magazines, but apparently the real author is concealing his identity. Probably for fear of alien retaliation.)
Many Americans work side by side with space aliens who look human — but you can spot these visitors by looking for certain [...]
http://www.latimes.com/news/nationworld/washingtondc/la-na-ticket5-2009apr05,0,3493188.story
From the Los Angeles Times
TOP OF THE TICKET
Few in White House appear to drive American cars
A parking lot survey turns up five U.S.-made vehicles out of 23.
By Andrew Malcolm and Johanna Neuman
April 5, 2009
Oops, it seems that many on President Obama’s team, including those seeking to save the American automobile industry, do [...]
The Avenger’s Handbook
Pål D. Ekran
October 11, 1999
——————————————————————————–
“Oh people, know that you have committed great sins. If you ask me what proof I have for these words, I say it is because I am the punishment of God. If you had not committed great sins, God would not have sent a punishment like me upon you.”
– [...]
Come to Glendale. Become a “pedestrian enforcement officer.” Earn $65,000 per year but you must sign your soul over to the devil. 4′ 3″ tall? No problem. Short fucks need not worry about height discrimination. We like your Napoleon complex.
They are setting up sting operations all over their creepy city. Here’s how it works:
You’re approaching an intersection with no stop sign or stop light.
There will be NO marked cross walks.
The street is busy.
When you’re about 150 ft away from the intersection, some dude steps off the curb and stands there looking at you.
He [...]
Gary Jules – Mad World
by san29
Slightly off center . . .
Take the money and run
GAINESVILLE, Fla. — The driver of a Brinks armored truck apparently took the money and ran. James Parker drove away in the truck — carrying several hundred thousand dollars — after a co-worker left the vehicle to pick up a deposit at a home-improvement store. The [...]
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Researchers Uncover Cyber Spy Network
By CHARMAINE NORONHA
AP
filed under: World News
TORONTO (March 29) – A cyber spy network based mainly in China hacked into classified documents from government and private organizations in 103 countries, including the computers of the Dalai Lama and Tibetan exiles, Canadian researchers said Saturday.
The work of the Information Warfare Monitor initially focused [...]
Eerie Figure Haunts Scottish Castle
CNN
filed under: Weird News, World News
(March 27) – The figure peers down silently from an upper floor of the ruins of a Scottish castle, wearing what looks like an outfit from the Middle Ages. Could this be a long-dead Scottish earl, or just a random, modern-day visitor?
The eerie image is captured [...]
A friend sent me this email. I loved the story so much, I felt compelled to share…
A Kid Whose Parents Just Got Divorced Writes A Book
by Brian Murphy on yesterday
Man falls asleep before last call. Sleeps it off in I Don’t Care bar and wakes up alarmed.
(Read more…)
Looking to have a ball?
Feel like going nuts?
Get out of the sack,
head on down to Oakdale, CA
if you have the cojones!
You need some huge gonads to munch in Oakdale, CA…
(read more…)
Pevely - Haunted Girl Scout Camp – As you first enter the gate to the camp, the first set of tents you come to is on the left. On a stormy night many years ago one of the girls needed to take a shower. So she walked to the shower house about six or seven yards from the tents. [...]
The Jersey Devil
The legendary Jersey Devil is a dragon-like creature, with a head like a horse, a snake-like body and bat’s wings. The Jersey Devil is rumored to inhabit the Pine Barrens in southern New Jersey, and has been known to cause chaos and panic whenever it rears its unattractive head; though there are some [...]
THE GATHERERS
THE GATHERERS
IN SOUTH TOM’S RIVER, HOME IS WHERE THE HUT IS
Buried in the woods of South Toms River, on the fringes of the Pine Barrens and society in general, stands a group of primitive structures that serve as the meeting grounds for a unusual group of folks who call themselves “The Gatherers.” Located on [...]
The Mysterious Pig Lady Attacks!
…In the early 1900s when Hillsborough was all farms and vast woods there lived a lady who resembled a pig. She lived on a farm secluded from civilization because as a child she was picked on and teased constantly, so she vowed never to have to deal with that kind of [...]
Student suspended for passing gas on bus
Driver writes up teen on misbehavior form; eighth-grader denies offense
updated 6:00 p.m. PT, Mon., March. 23, 2009
LAKELAND, Fla. – An eighth-grader was suspended from riding the school bus for three days after being accused of passing gas.
The bus driver wrote on a misbehavior form that a 15-year-old teen passing [...]
MSNBC.com
Man accused of freezing mom, cashing checks
Cops found the body in October after getting a tip about woman’s death
The Associated Press
updated 6:16 p.m. PT, Wed., March. 25, 2009
COLCHESTER, New York – A New York state man has been accused of stashing his 98-year-old mother’s dead body in a freezer in their home so he could [...]
A dinosaur that masterbates. Everytime I thought I’d seen it all, something like this comes along:
And this is supposed to be better than it was 6 months ago? LMFAO!!! Turds in a suit.
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There are better ways to get around. As severe as it may seem, collapse and devastation force creative change. Here’s just one example of the exciting future:
The two front wheels add stability. This is being developed by Paggio, an Italian manufacturer. Even so, here in Southern California, startup companies that will retrofit just [...]
I just found Lars’ YouTube. Damn! I didn’t realize you could dance so good dude.
cala-am00410017
Remember creating your own funny stories with Mad Libs? It’s still around.
Just click the link below. Then complete the answers. It’s easy.
email this posting to a friend philadelphia craigslist > rants & raves
please flag with care:
miscategorized
prohibited
spam/overpost
best of craigslist
Please report suspected exploitation of minors to the appropriate authorities
Reply to: pers-1041595631@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2009-02-19, 2:12PM EST
Check out the rants and raves in St. Louis. There is [...]
I guess it’s true. The book and the cover really are two different things. Google it asshole.
There’s a daycare and preschool by my house. In front of the daycare, up against the road, is a fenced in retention pond. A week ago they began trapping the children inside the fence and not letting them out. None of them have proper coats on or any food at all. After a few days, [...]
Dear Readers and Disappointed “Cool” People:
Recently, I’ve been exposed for my blatant hypocrisy. As the admin of ”my” website, it’s my custom to change “the rules” to suit the situation at hand. Ive also been exposed as:
1) A Cake Lady imposter using Craigslist RnR to make personal blogger profiles public knowledge. This information was only available [...]
1hunglow is tamere… Oh my!
This guy’s got some funny stuff. I saw a link to it on LA RnR. Check it out and put some comment’s up if you’re moved. I LMFAO at this one:
Dear President Obama
Don’t worry sensitive Obamabots, it’s not insulting to Obama.
My name is tamere and I don’t like hispanics with dark skin. That’s because I’m really good looking and sharp as a river stone.
tamere. If posting here keeps you from opening up a random can of rage on an Ecuadorian family in the streets, then I’m all for it. I just don’t get all the anger and rage against people from Ecuador. Do you have any personal experiences where you’ve been unjustly treated? Maybe a jilted lover thing? [...]
He dropped off the face of the earth! I’m worried that the Grays have gotten to him.
Here is a gratuitous image of the family violence that was my daily life growing up.
The funny posts are few and far between on Saint Louis Rants & Raves. But if you really want to read Rants & Raves in it’s finest realized potential, spend some time on Los Angeles Rant & Raves. It’s everything I hope this place might become some day.
This is a Hollywood driven culture. We want women constructed with plastic shims, hair dye, collagen bloated lips, bleached anuses, botoxed foreheads, and silicon tits. Damn you! Get with the program Curtis. Even stupid bitch ass politicians know that. No one wants to see a woman talking about fiber in a Hollywood society. What’s next? [...]
Is this the Saint Louis RnR Notorious Flagger?
listpic is a cool site for addicted morAns of Craigslist. And for the uninitiated noobtards, morAns is the correct Internet spelling.
If your a CL pic collector, this is must see stuff? Sheckitout:
Saint Louis
Knoxville
Philadelphia
All I ask is you share some of your great finds with us here at morAns!
Google Cache
Freedom of Speech does not mean that all speech is protected under the Constitution of the United States. One type of unprotected speech is “fighting words.” The fighting words may include a variety of forms of communication. But the gist of it is that if you piss someone off because of what you say, write [...]
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ATTN HUDSON VALLEY!!! STOP FLAGGING POSTS!!!
Remember the story about the guy in Valentine, NB that smeared lotion and petrolium jellyon his ass and balls, and then on the windows of downtown shops and the Methodist Church? That was tamere…
I leave to take a MUD and wipe my tamere and everyone disappears. WTF?
I’ve been emailing the man that developed the theme of this web site, Aaron Brazell, asking for ideas. But he prefers to use Twitter which forces one to express their message in 140 characters or less.
I think of the communication that happens during my hectic days and how I respond to long chain letter emails that have [...]
Kingsford Goes to the Beach – Watch more funny videos here
For whatever reason, we howled at this moran’s Valentines wish:
BEST POST EVER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (LA)
Reply to: pers-1031495751@craigslist.org [?]
Date: 2009-02-11, 11:18PM PST
I’m so proud of this one; I laughed by myself for like 40 seconds.
________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
OFFER……. M4W 33 LA
Ladies……I would like to take this chance to post in the LTR section of CL and offer you [...]
Why did they have to fill our minds with possible “conditions” that we never knew we had before? That fucking restless leg syndrome is the one that really pisses me off. I never even payed any attention to it before. In fact, I laughed in disbelieve when I first heard it advertised; as though the [...]
When a cracker male turns 13, he is summons to the garage and given “the talk.” The time tested tradition of Indoctrination originated with the founding fathers under the guidance of Gray Alien Authorities and has continued to this day; cloaked in secracy and dark magic.
I remember my talk. I was given detail instructions on [...]
I think I can help you Internet Stooge. I took an elective in college on Broken English. tamere studies Hispanic, and more specifically Ecuadorian, culture and developed some interesting theories on the genetic predispositions and behaviors of Hispanics. The evidence is observational and anecdotal, but here’s what I’ve learned so far:
Hispanic’s hygiene reminds tamere of [...]
Some nice wholesome Christian music!
Her doctors should have microwaved her last six eggs and served them as free breakfast at Denny’s… huevos welfaros.
I started using Craigslist over four years ago. I began by selling things I would have otherwise donated to charity. It worked out pretty well. Then I found this artical in the ‘best of” section:
To the Fly I Just Killed in My Apartment
I told your bitch ass that I would get you two days ago [...]
Whenever Dennis Kucinich speaks, subliminal messages IP packets are broadcast to the Internet. These packets replicate and send subliminal images to your computer monitor. He was raised to be a presidential “also ran” as a psychologically disarming cover to his true sinister nature. How else can you explain a short ugly man’s marraige to a [...]
In the secret laboratory where Octomom’s babies were hatched, a shady deal was secured between Barrack Obama and Gray Alien conspirators. This Ufologist learned that one of the babies was given to a shadow governemt within the US government whose chief aim is to laison for the Gray Alien scourge that is hell bent on [...]